I Love You This Much
by His.Infernal.Majesty
Summary: Yusuke grew up without a father, or with a father that was never there. But if Yusuke could talk to him for real, what would he say?


Hey. I was watching a music video, and I decided that I would love to make this into a one-shot like a bunch of my other fics. Please enjoy this.

I don't know the real story behind Yusuke's father, but this is how I think of it. This is slightly AU. Cause I don't know the real story like I said before.

I Love You This Much

He can't remember the times that he thought  
Does my daddy love me?  
Probably not  
But that didn't stop him from wishing that he did  
Didn't keep from wanting or worshiping him

A child sat in front of a large tree, tossing a baseball between his small, tan hands.

Yusuke looked up as a car pulled up to the house behind him.

Yusuke stood as a man climbed out of the car, and walked up to the front door of the house.

He guesses he saw him about once a year  
He could still feel the way he felt  
Standing in tears  
Stretching his arms out as far as they'd go  
Whispering daddy, I want you to know

A woman, Atsuko, Yusuke's mom, came out of the house, yelling at the man.

"I told you not to come back! Go! Leave my little boy alone! Go! You're not wanted here!"

The man shook his head and started to leave, Atsuko reached out and grabbed his arm. "I'm not done with you!"

A silver lighter flew out of his hand as Yusuke's father walked back to his car.

Yusuke blinked. "Daddy…" he whispered.

I love you this much and I'm waiting on you  
To make up your mind, do you love me too?  
However long it takes  
I'm never giving up  
No matter what, I love you this much

The man looked back at him.

"I want you to know." Yusuke threw his arms wide and yelled to him. "I love you this much! And I'm waiting on you, to make up your mind. Do you love me too? However long it takes, Daddy! I'm never giving up. No matter what…"

The man just shook his head and climbed into his car.

Yusuke's eyes filled with tears as he drove away.

"I love you this much…" he whispered, knowing the man he called father couldn't hear him.

10 years later…

Yusuke sat in a church, head hung. His usually gelled-back hair was loose and fell into his eyes. He didn't blink…but sorrow was evident in his eyes…and hate. Yes, after all those years of trying to get his 'father' to love him, he now hated him. 'What kind of father does that to his son?'

He grew to hate him for what he had done  
'Cause what kind of a father, could do that to his son  
He said 'Damn you, Daddy', the day that he died  
The man didn't blink, but the little boy cried

People filed into the church, and his best friend Kurama came over and hugged him. "I'm sorry, Yusuke. I'm not going to say this is hard on you…but I know it must be…because you loved him at one time." The other teen walked off, and sat down.

Yusuke walked up to the casket, a silver cigarette lighter in his hand. The same one his father had dropped ten years ago in his yard.

Inside the casket was his father. The casket was closed…but Yusuke could see him clearly as if it were open.

He placed the lighter on top of the dark wood of the casket, and muttered. "Damn you, Daddy."

Yusuke didn't blink at all, and no tears shone in his eyes…but inside of him, the little boy that never left cried.

"I love you this much…and I'm waiting on you…to make up your mind…do you love me too? However long it takes…I'm never giving up…no matter what…I love you this much." Yusuke muttered all this under his breath, and nobody heard. Nobody heard his heart break as he gazed at the name on the casket.

I love you this much and I'm waiting on you  
To make up your mind, do you love me too?  
However long it takes  
I'm never giving up  
No matter what, I love you this much

_Okiro__ Urameshi_

_Husband…forgotten father…_

Half way through the service  
While the choir sang a hymn  
He looked up above the preacher  
And he sat and stared at him

Yusuke looked up at the preacher, but something caught his eye…a stained glass portrait…a man holding his arms out wide, hands nailed to the cross.(1)

Yusuke's eyes softened as realization hit him. He had hated his father…believing himself to be unloved…but he was an idiot. "Forgive me, father."

But it was a different father. 'I haven't been unloved or alone all my life.'

He said "Forgive me father"  
When he realized  
That he hadn't been unloved or alone all his life  
His arms were stretched out as far as they'd go  
Nailed to the cross, for the whole world to know

Yusuke smiled…and started to whisper… "I love you this much…and I'm waiting on you, to make up your mind. Do you love me too? However long it takes, I'm never giving up. No matter what, I love you this much."

I love you this much and I'm waiting on you  
To make up your mind, do you love me too?  
However long it takes  
I'm never giving up  
No matter what, I love you this much

"I love you this much…"

(1) I know that the worship of Jesus Christ is forbidden in Japan…but I don't know Buddha or Kami. So, work with me here!

Kay. There we go. Pointless, but I liked writing it. Review!


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